Since having Gideon, I've found that I'm quite emotional. Not about him though, about Caleb. I suppose it's because it's glaringly obvious how big Caleb has become and how many milestones he's achieved when compared to his younger brother. At times, these emotions don't surprise me. For instance, the first night I rocked Caleb to sleep (yes, we still rock him to sleep-don't judge) after Gideon was born. I looked down at Caleb and realized how big he was, how heavy he felt in my arms, how his features are becoming more mature, etc. and naturally, I cried a little and squeezed him a little tighter. Then there are other times where the emotions catch me completely off-guard. Caleb was watching Barney recently; the cast members and that friendly purple (more magenta than purple if you ask me) dino were singing "The Itsy Bitsy Spider." I have been singing that song to Caleb with accompanying hand motions for months. He likes it and when I stop singing, he generally moves my hands to prompt me to begin again. This time was different. As Caleb is watching the show, I look up and see him performing the hand motions on his own...cue crying. Witnessing his increasing ability to understand is amazing and crazy and sometimes kinda sad. It's proof that one day, he'll be a little boy and then a teen and then a man....sigh.
